Content.

I want to know where I wil be in the next few years. Like, will I have any exciting stories of my college life to tell my grandkids someday? Of course, I don't really want to know what's going to happen. I don't want to know that I'm going to flunk a midterm because I didn't even know I had one. I don't want to know that I'm going to have a falling out with a close friend, or that the person I hardly ever talk to will become really important to me. That I'll study abroad for a year, that I'll loose my scholarships due to the economy, or that I'll find my love.
Those things are meant to unfold over time, not to be revealed all at once. They are to be built up to, like the climax of a movie. My life is not a movie with one central climax. Rather, it is made up of many problems and resolutions, climaxes and falls.
My problem is not neccessarily that I'm eager to experience certain things, to "grow up" and see the world. Rather, that I lack paitence.
I'm content with where I am, and I certainly wouldn't want life to fly by or for me to miss something. But still there I times when it seems like I'm so close to something, but it will still be a while before I'm there. It's in those moments that I find myself leaning forward and reaching. But, like in real life when ever I'm standing on a chair, trying to reach something on a shelf, I fall, and the item I was reaching for tips over the edge of the shelf, and crashes down on top of me, breaking into shards.