20th.

1) I should stop posting ONLY when I feel melancholy, and do more posts when I'm in a good state of mind. (I think most of my recent posts have been from days when I'm upset)

2) I've been feeling a lot different about the age thing. I mean, yea, 20 in particular isn't exciting to me, and my age probably never will be. But I guess my feeling about birthdays in general has improved. I think to ignore it completely would be depressing. It's still a nice day. I think just to have one day where I can trump other choices (like what we're eating, what ride we're going on) because I get to pull the birthday-card, is a plus. It's weird to be "selfish" like that, but it's also probably healthy too, in a certain way.

3) It's now my birthday. Well, technically I think I wasn't born until about 12:20pm or something like that, but same difference.

I went out to dinner with my grandma, my cousin brought me scones at 11:30pm, (along with an awesome Mario Super-'shroom keycahin) and my beautiful, amazing floor-mates came by at 11:58 and counted down to midnight, and then sang. haha. Watching them try to be quiet was truly entertaining, especially since our dorm has outdoor hallways, and everyone had their windows open.

I opened a birthday present from my parents. It was a little philosophy "birthday girl" set, with some lotion, lip gloss, etcetera. I don't know if you are familiar with the philosophy brand of skin care, but their products have a "philosophy" written on them. This is what was written on the travel make-up bag that came with the set I got:

birthday girl. philosophy: be grateful to have been given one more day, let alone one more year. remember to dance in your nightgown, sing in the shower, ride a bike, fly a kite and take an occasional "wind bath" in your bare skin. give those you love big kisses, big hugs, and the words "i love you" often and always. nurture your body rather than starve your soul with fad dieting. spend time with the old and the weary to better appreciate your life. on your birthday, call your mother and father wherever they are to thank them for all that they have done for you, even if you think they haven't done enough. watch the movie "life is beautiful" at least once a year. remember that you are not guaranteed tomorrow and that today is as good as it gets. thank God for every "thing", every "day", every moment.

And that's exactly what I'm going to do. Those little things are what make me the happiest. I don't think that birthdays ought to be viewed as vitally important; there is too much expectation placed on them (the same way that society places too much expectation on Summer or Christmas). But a birthday really is just a celebration of life. It's a pretty good day to spend laying in the grass, being with the people you love, and thanking God for every way he has guided you and preserved you.

Now, I am going to finish up my one-page reflection for my elementary math class, and then I'm going to watch La vita è bella. No, seriously, I really am.